The hospital was not far from the therapist's office and I arrived within ten minutes, humming the girl from Ipanema all the while I was travelling.
'Young and tall and tanned and lovely…'
Fixing my hijab in the mirror of my car, examining the make up, wondering why I know the lyrics to that song when I can't remember listening to it, I found myself presentable, and squirted five sprays of perfume around myself, immuring myself in the fragrance of honey.
'Such a nice scent,' I said aloud. 'If I can't have it on my teeth, I can still have it on my body. How can anyone live without honey?'
I stepped out of the car and walked towards the hospital. Due greetings are given to all those who crossed me and I reached my little kingdom, my examination room. I dropped my things in the back of this examining room, grey, and neutral, and then went through my prospective appointments.
The first one was a sports injury, a possible tear of the rotator cuff. A sports injury I mused, another athletic type. What's the age again? Fifty three. I let out a noise of relief. He won't be too attractive then, thank God.
I left my little kingdom, the only place where touch was allowed, even when it was hateful, and went up to the waiting area, next to the reception. This area was four lines of single chairs, seven chairs in each line, where everyone was waiting for sonographic scans.
There were three people waiting. One was an older lady wearing a summer dress and a white wide brimmed hat. One was an older Indian man wearing a garment traditional to India, a fellow comrade in the retention of one's culture in a foreign land. The last was a younger looking man, European, wearing shorts. 'Tanned and lovely,' I nearly groaned. All three looked up at me, hopeful. Which one of you shall I disappoint? Taking a deep breath for dramatic effect, looking at everyone and no one, I announced:
'Federico Ricci?'
'Yay,' the younger looking man said, jovially, and jumped up.
'Follow me,' I said, noting a strong Australian accent, and an even stronger vitality in his 'yay'. That meant another interrogation.
Before I even turned around, the lady in the summer dress shouted:
'But how can that be! My appointment was supposed to be twenty minutes ago. How much longer!'
'I'm sorry,' I said, awkwardly, looking at her.
There is something in the way I speak that seems to act as a natural sedative in all those I try to calm down. I don't know why this is, or why it's so effective but no one seems to be able to stay angry when I confront them.
I looked at the now startled woman whose irritation had disappeared. She had the bearing of someone guilty before another person, or, pitying the other person, seeking their forgiveness.
'Very well,' the lady said with her eyes enlarged. 'I didn't mean to be so loud.'
'That's okay,' I responded, smiling a forgiving smile. 'I hope you get seen soon.'
But why though, why do they change so wildly when I start to speak, I wonder again. What is it about me that seems to incite pity? Or was it just the way I express myself...
We went to the examination room, me and Federico. He was taller and much younger looking than I had anticipated. God, I have to leave this job as soon as I can, I said to myself.
'Alright. Take a seat on this table here, Federico. 'How are you today, by the way?' I asked, my back turned towards him, approaching the computer.
'Very good; thank you, miss…'
'Oh yeah, sorry, my name is Zahra,' I said, turning to him, giggling a little.
'Zahra.' He had a curious look on his face like he was contemplating an unusual artefact. 'Thank you for choosing me and not that woman.'
'Ha. I'm following the appointment sequence. It's not a personal choice.'
'You calmed her down real quick. Is that your superpower?'
'...maybe...'
'Zahra...where is that name from?'
'Hold on, you're going to make someone else mad by dragging this longer than necessary.'
He smiled a good natured smile.
'Okay,' I said, with an exhalation that says I'm getting back to business. 'So this is a sports injury. On your shoulder?'
'Yes, that's right, left shoulder.'
'How long ago did it start?'
'Three weeks ago. I tried to leave it to see if it would heal by itself by no luck. Then I tried to see if a massage would work and went to a massage parlour.'
'Massage parlour?'
'Yeah, a Romanian one, deep tissue.'
'Oh yeah?'
'Don't know if you had one?'
'Never had the pleasure.'
'A pleasure it was too. It felt good at the time but it wouldn't go away. That's why I'm here.'
'I've had scalp massages before. They make me feel relaxed.'
'Is that in addition to a regular massage?'
'No.'
'Just a scalp massage?'
'Yes.'
'Really ! Is that a professional one?'
'Yes.'
'You keep your scarf on or take it off?'
'I keep it on.'
'Wow!'
'But let's get back to the matter at hand, Federico, I'll have a look now. Take your shirt off, and we'll do some scanning.'
He took his shirt off gingerly, grimacing as he did so. I put some gloves on and turned the ultrasound machine on. He was an extremely well built man.
'How was your day, Zahra?'
'Good. This is going to feel funny. It's a particular gel necessary for the images.'
'I'm used to funny feelings.'
I put the scanner on the shoulder trying to avoid this man's eyes. All my answers were directed at either the shoulder or the screen. In fact I'm trying to look at the screen to guide his attention to the screen and away from me but to no avail.
'Put your arm behind your back and bend forward slightly.'
He did part one but not part two and instinctively I moved his shoulder to the right position. He turned away in politeness and looked at the screen.
'You take some pretty pictures. Did you find anything ? '
'It does look like a tear,' I said, finishing up. I put the scanner away and grabbed some tissue to hand to him.
'Thanks. So what's next, Zahra?' he asked with a humbled and helpless expression.
'I'll send this to your general practitioner and they will arrange further measures.'
'How long will I be out of commission? I need to get back in the gym asap.'
'You won't do that for a while. You don't have to wait to put your shirt back on though.'
He put his shirt back on.
'Thank you, Zahra. This is the first step to recovery. At my age things start to fall apart. Have you read that novel?' he asked suddenly.
'What novel?'
'Things fall apart. It's by an African writer.'
'Never heard of it.'
'From Nigeria. Where are you from?'
'Somalia.'
'I thought so. My cousin is married to an Eritrean.'
'Oh yeah?'
Here we go again, I thought. A nice friendly guy who wanted to talk about his experiences and wanted to know mine. I watched him talk and barely listened, wondering how they were made this way. How does a person get so friendly?
When he eventually left I sat alone again and had to wash away the friendliness and the close contact with that of others. I grabbed my phone and read the next story.
'I was sitting in a casino on one of the slot machines when she sat on the machine next to me. I stiffened slightly as this girl was not the type I usually saw in the slot area. She was a young girl, slim, wearing a tight blue dress. A strange exotic girl who looked almost Chinese but something was off. Her lips were too full.
'I just seen someone lose a thousand on that machine and not get a single free spin. It's bound to pay out soon,' I told her as she was scrolling through the games.
'Which one?' she asked sharply.
'This one,' I said, crossing over and tapping the game icon on the screen, hoping she got a whiff of the thick smoky Tom Ford I was wearing.
'So you think this will pay?' she said as she selected the lowest possible bet, telling me that she was killing time and not interested in making money.
'A bored girl?' I said, smiling to myself. 'I'll get lucky tonight come what may.'
'Yes. I think it will pay you.'
'So why don't you play here then?'
'Because I've been playing here for hours. I can't leave this machine until I leave with nothing.'
'How much you have now?'
Now it was her turn to waft her perfume on me, chacun son tour. It was a sweet intoxicating fragrance that was popular but its popularity hadn't diluted its power.
'You still have some money -'
She froze as did I when the familiar sound of a potential free spins came on.
To get a certain number of free spins in most slot games you need three symbols on the screen. Once one symbol appears a recognizable sound comes on to indicate the potential of free spins. In this game the symbol was a redheaded mermaid. One of those symbols had appeared, and then another. Absorbed by the screen, both of us waited on tenterhooks for the third one, but it never came.
'Fuck this game,' I spat out. 'So close! I can't get anything today. Last time was so much better,' I added smoothly, putting the bait out.
'What did you get?'
'Tell me your name first.'
'Angela.'
'Angela, my name is Jules.'
'What did you get last time,' she asked again, with a fleshy smile and a playful voice.
'Five thousand.'
'On what machine?' she asked with a clearly raised heartbeat.
'This one,' I said, tapping the start button. 'But it ain't paying today.' I raised the bet to the maximum, like a high roller. I could tell that she was watching me, and her smile turned from coy to appreciation.
'I noticed your accent. Are you here on a holiday?'
'Yeah.'
'Where from?'
I hoped to God she would say Taiwan because I had experience with Taiwanese women.
'Taiwan.'
An euphoric joy came over me, akin to a grand machine payout, as I sensed a good night in front of me.
I love women from Taiwan.
'I always wanted to go there. You from Taipei?'
'Yeah. You know Taipei? Why do you want to go there?'
'You know exactly why,' I replied as once again one symbol came on my screen and then another. I looked down at my bet amount and thought that if I got free spins now I'll easily make a grand. I shouted yes! as the third symbol came. Angela also made noises of delight and amazement.
'And,' she pointed at my bet amount. 'Maximum bet.'
'Damn right baby,' I said joyfully. 'Maximum!'
A wonderfully hypnotic Indian flute song came on at the onset of the twenty free spins. Both of us were charmed by the sound of the flute and the sight of the numbers rocking up. An intense excitement came over me as I balled my fist up, and then relaxed as I saw the threshold of a thousand reached at the last of the free spins.
I looked at Angela, decently having returned to her own screen, bathing in the light of the slot machines and saw her face cracked into two colours, yellow and white, her make up coming off at this early hour. I had never seen a girl who looked so strange before.
'We should celebrate. You like champagne?'
'I love champagne,' she answered, smiling, facing her screen, tensing her body like she was about to dive into it. It looked like she couldn't experience emotion without expression.
'Come then,' I said, printing out my ticket, giving her the ultimatum.
'You mean somewhere else?'
'Yeah.'
She looked up, hesitated slightly, turning back to her screen and then printed her ticket with the sexiest pursing of the lips.
'She did that too easily,' I thought to myself, 'but if she asks me to pay later, fuck it, I'll pay. But I'm sure she's a foreign girl with loose sexual mores, Americanised, and she's coming because she's bored and wants excitement.'
We walked to cash out our tickets with me telling stupid jokes and her laughing exaggerated girlish laughs. We were on the same page all the way to the hotel I was staying in.
Once in the room, she asked where the champagne was. I answered her with a kiss. She had really soft lips and was gentle with the way she kissed.
'I got something better than champagne for you.'
I took the straps off her dress to expose her small breasts with curiously long black nipples. She still hadn't asked for any money which meant I had made a winning bet. She was just a Taiwanese girl looking for a good time.
I pulled her long nipples in awe and watched them swell up. She let out a noise of pain, and loosened her neck muscles.
'I never seen such long nipples before. Big nipples, small tits,' I added, grinning, and took one in between my teeth and grinded it. She let out another whimper of pain and tried to push me away. I grinded her nipple in between my teeth one more time before leaving her wet nipple alone.
In a flash we're both completely naked when I felt her lips around my cock. With no guidance! She had a slow dedicated technique that can only be described as cock worship.
Appraising the length of her really slim body I could see the outline of her tailbone as she sucked dick. Her cracked face, with its yellow and white, the texture of her tongue and the fullness of her lips got me to near bursting point.
'Come baby.'
'I want you to eat -'
'I'll make this dick scoop out the pussy juice, I don't want to use my tongue.'
Truth was that she had a black forest down there and I didn't want to put my mouth anywhere near the thick mass of stark black hair. I lifted her up by grabbing her loose flat booty and kissed her lips with my dick taste on it.
She was so light that I guided her body towards my dick and put it in while holding her in my hands. She let out a hissing sound, which turned into a cry when I made her pubic hair bend to my pelvic bone.
Her pussy had such a strong grip that I wanted to come immediately, so I didn't stroke. I put her on her back and reached for her lips while I got adjusted to her walls which had the softest type of squeeze.
The true strength of a man is determined by how long he can keep his dick hard in these circumstances and I measured myself accordingly.
After a minute of my dick trying to squirt but being held by immobility, I calmed down and started to pull out while her body and her face looked like she couldn't move if she wanted to.
I pulled it out all the way to make a popping, releasing sound that soggy wet pussy makes when the dick comes out. Angela made a similar sound of release with her voice. I put it back in and started stroking, watching her face contort, then watching us in the mirror, her pure white legs and my black ass, stroking up and down, dragging the red folds of her pussy in and out, and then I looked down and see a thin trickle of white pussy juice shining on my…'
For the third time today, I felt the contraction, expansion and release of orgasm as I leaned my head back on my throne, my computer chair, in my little kingdom, the examination room, a Somali empress, a sonographer. I then put my head down on the keyboard to extract the pleasure for as long as I can. When I raised my head I saw that I had erased the data that was there.
